Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6
Title: “Don’t Tug on Superman’s Cape”
Medium: television series episode
Original airdate: 5 Nov. 1995
Publisher:
7 characters in this story:
Character (Click links for info about character and his/her religious practice, affiliation, etc.) |
Religious Affiliation |
Team(s) [Notes] |
Pub. | # app. |
||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
|
Kryptonians; Super Friends... ![]() |
![]() |
13,409 | ||||||
|
|
Raleigh College [Superman's girlfriend, then wife] |
![]() |
3,859 | ||||||
|
|
The Legion of Super-Heroes [Superman's pal] |
![]() |
1,896 | ||||||
|
|
[Superman's (Clark Kent's) boss; Daily Planet editor] | ![]() |
1,574 | ||||||
|
|
[Superman's adoptive father] | ![]() |
816 | ||||||
|
|
[Superman's adoptive mother] | ![]() |
827 | ||||||
|
[scientist] | ![]() |
16 |
In terms of religious content, "Don't Tug on Superman's Cape," the 6th episode in season 3 of Lois & Clark, represents a major change change from the previous two episodes. Episodes 4 and 5 featured nearly non-stop religious content, overtly religious allies, and overtly religious villains: a Druid/Celtic priest and a would-be Judaeo-Christian prophet who thought he was a modern-day Noah. Season 3 Episode 6, on the other hand, features a pair of the most totally secular, non-religious villains to ever appear in this series. Tim and Amber Lake are super-wealthy jet-setters, among the nation's best known billionaires, who steal and murder without any religious or ideaological reason whatsoever. They do so purely for the thrill of it.
This episode's featured villains are played with gleeful evil abandon by real-life married couple Jonathan Frakes (best known as "Commander Ryker" on Star Trek: The Next Generation) and Genie Francis (best known as "Laura Spencer" on the long-running soap opera General Hospital).
[This episode begins with an impressive homage to the classic I Love Lucy sitcom, with Clark Kent and Lois Lane stepping into the parts of Lucy and her husband Ricky Ricardo. Clark's parents stand in for the Ricardos' older neighbors, Fred and Ethel Mertz. The scene turns out to be a dream Clark was having, brought on by his anxiety over his progressing relationship with Lois Lane and their likely impending marriage.
[Clark is awakened from his dream by a phone call from Lois Lane, who informs him that "Bad Brain Johnson" has escaped from jail. Bad Brain Johnson had a vendetta against Superman, Clark Kent, and Lois Lane.
[After the opening credits we see Bad Brain Johnson (in disguise) being escorted into the massive mansion of Tim and Amber Lake. Bad Brain Johnson discards his disguise and asks the Lakes what they want with him. They open a secret panel, escort him into their secret treasure trove, and explain what they want with him.
BELOW: This episode's villains - manifestly non-religious super-rich collectors Tim and Amber Lake - are introduced:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Timecode: 3 minutes, 41 seconds:
Bad Brain Johnson: First I want some answers. Who are you? Why'd you bust me out? Talk, or I'll kill you, call a cab, and motor my butt down to Funky Town for a little R and R [i.e., "Rest and Relaxation"].
Amber Lake: [impressed by Bad Brain Johnson's aggressive, evil demeanor] Oo.
[Tim Lake presses a button that causes a wall to slide into the ceiling, revealing a secret room. A Batmobile can be seen on display there.]
BELOW: Tim and Amber Hunt invite Bad Brain Johnson into their secret collection room; note the Batmobile which is part of their collection:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Tim Lake: This way.
Amber Lake: Please.
Tim Lake: The reason for your liberation, Mr. Johnson, is Amber and I believe that you might possess something that we hope to find very useful.
Bad Brain Johnson: What's that?
Amber Lake: A thirst for vengeance.
Bad Brain Johnson: We wouldn't be discussing "Klutz" Kent, "Nosey" Lane and "Super-Duper," would we?
Amber Lake: Yes.
Tim Lake: We would.
Amber Lake: As to who we are, well, did you happen to catch the articles written in Forbes, Vanity Fair and Esquire while you were in prison?
Bad Brain Johnson: Uh, actually, I'm more of a, uh, Popular Mechanics / Slaughterhouse Digest kind of guy.
BELOW: Rich collectors Tim and Amber Lake: 'Possession is our passion':
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Amber Lake: We're rich people, Bad Brain!
Tim Lake: Rich people! With a hobby. We collect things. Rare, unusual, one-of-a-kind things. Aside from each other.
Amber Lake: Possession is our passion.
[Tim and Amber both laugh gleefully while holding each other close, walking through their collection.]
BELOW: Tim and Amber Lake show off their collection of unique famous items:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Tim Lake: This block of cement . . .
Amber Lake: Jimmy Hoffa! . . . And here, the arms of the Venus de Milo.
Tim Lake: [motioning to the Batmobile] This car, of course, one of a kind.
Amber Lake: [giggles] We're just batty about it!
[Tim and Amber Lake both laugh.]
Tim Lake: On the right! The original draft of the Magna Carta. It's a room full of treasures. No one knows they're here. They're just for us!
Amber Lake: And now we'd like to add something else to our collection.
Tim Lake: But Kent, Lane and Superman stand in the way.
Bad Brain Johnson: [menacingly] And you want me to do your dirty work for you?
Tim and Amber Lake: [in unison] Yes.
Bad Brain Johnson: [matter-of-factly] I love dirty work.
[It is clear here that Bad Brain Johnson is quite willing to do whatever "dirty work" that the Lakes might call on him to do, especially if it means causing harm to Lois Lane, Clark Kent and/or Superman. Bad Brain Johnson looks over to a darkened corner of a room.]
Bad Brain Johnson: Hey, what's that?
[Amber Lake flips a light switch. The light illuminates an array of advanced, complicated machinery.]
Bad Brain Johnson: Hey, that's my stuff!
[Bad Brain Johnson rushes over to the equipment. Tim and Amber Lake smile to see Bad Brain Johnson walking into their evil trap. They giggle with each other.]
Tim Lake: That's right, "BB", the fantastic electronic gadgets--
Amber Lake: --You made famous in your crime career.
Bad Brain Johnson: Hey, how'd you find my secret lair, huh? It's secret!
Tim Lake: We queried a few of your cronies.
Bad Brain Johnson: Blabbermouths. I'll kill 'em!
Amber Lake: [smiling broadly] Oh, don't worry about that!
[Amber Lake giggles. It is clear from her tone of voice and laugh that she and her husband murdered Bad Brain Johnson's old "cronies" after obtaining the information they wanted from the hapless criminals. They Lakes show absolutely no remorse at having committed those murders. Quite the contrary. They seem positively thrilled and gleeful at having murdered people.]
Amber Lake: [to Bad Brain Johnson] Did we do well?
[Bad Brain Johnson puts his hands on two gold spheres that sit atop columns of electronic equipment as high as his head.]
Bad Brain Johnson: Ah, the electro-whammy! Did you know that the human body is an electrochemical engine and that if you amplify its current, resonate it, and kick it over with a little household A.C.: Zap! [blows, as if blowing ashes out of his hand.] Ashes to ashes.
Tim Lake: How about a demonstration?
Bad Brain Johnson: Oh, well, we would need a Guinea pig.
[By this, he means they would need a human victim in order to demonstrate his machine. Tim Lake looks at his wife, who holds up a remote control device.]
Amber Lake: I believe we've got one.
BELOW: Tim and Amber Lake gleefully murder Bad Brain Johnson:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
[Amber presses a button and the electro-whammy device hums to life, sparking electricity between the two columns and gold spheres. Bad Brain Johnson looks shocked for the brief moments before he is zapped and reduced to a pile of dust. After murdering Bad Brain Johnson, Tim and Amber Lake laugh hysterically.]
Amber Lake: Phase One--
Tim Lake: --Complete!
[Tim and Amber Lake hold each other close and kiss passionately. Murder is probably something of an aphrodesiac for this unbelievably evil, narcistic couple. End of scene.]
Timecode: 6 minutes, 44 seconds: Daily Planet offices. A woman wearing a security officer's uniform is carrying a box. She gets the attention of the receptionist and asks for Perry White.
Woman with box: Ahem. Perry White?
[The receptionist points to Perry White, who is standing just a few feet away. He is very pleased when he sees that the delivery he has been expecting has arrived.]
BELOW: Oh thank God! The bullet-proof vests for Lois and Clark have arrived...
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Perry White: Oh, thank God! They finally arrived! Here, Jimmy. [takes the box and shoves it at Jimmy Olsen.] Uh, thank you, officer!
[Perry White waves the delivery person away. He walks over to Lois Lane and Clark Kent while lifting a bullet-proof vest from the box.]
Lois Lane: Oh, I am not wearing a bullet-proof vest!
Perry White: I want you protected!
Clark Kent: Chief, I don't think Superman's gonna let anything happen to us.
Perry White: I don't see him here now, do you?
[Lois and Clark say nothing. They don't want to let anybody know the secret they share: That Clark Kent is actually Superman. Perry takes their silence as a sign that they have no retort to his pointing out that Superman isn't there now, and that if anybody attacks them, they would be without protection.]
Perry White: See? Exactly. Wear 'em!
Jimmy Olsen: Maybe you guys could start a new fashion trend.
Perry White: Jimmy.
Jimmy Olsen: Maybe not.
[Lois Lane turns to other matters. She asks Jimmy about what she asked him to do to help her and Clark with tracking down recent prison escapee Bad Brain Johnson.]
Lois Lane: So, what do you have?
BELOW: Bad Brain Johnson's accomplices left this plane of existence (because they were murdered by Tim and Amber Lake):
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Jimmy Olsen: I've had no luck tracking Bad Brain through his pals. His last three accomplices are no longer in Metropolis.
Clark Kent: What, they left town?
Jimmy Olsen: They left this plane of existence. All three were murdered one week ago. Tortured to death. No clues. No suspects.
Lois Lane: Why tortured?
Clark Kent: Somebody probably wanted some information.
Lois Lane: So what we're left with, according to the warden, is two unknown accomplices who blasted a well-known lunatic out of prison.
[With his super-hearing, Clark Kent hears alarms going off at S.T.A.R. Labs. There is an armed robbery in progress there, according to police scanners he hears. As Superman, he rushes to the scene, followed by Lois Lane. They are too late to prevent the robbers from getting away. The robbers used gas to incapacitate people in the lab. Superman helps people out of the building. Dr. Klein informs Superman that the robbers took all the Kryptonite they had stored there. Dr. Klein was working on a radiation treatment that would hopefully cure Superman's Kryptonite weakness. But Lois Lane is angry that any was stored that all, and that Clark had not told her about it. Superman and Lois argue a little, out of earshot of others, about whether or not two people who are engaged or married should tell people everything. They are careful not to say "marriage," because they had agreed (in a recent previous episode) not to say the "m" word while they get adjusted simply to being a dating couple. After arguing some with Lois, Superman sees a clue: tire treads in mud, left by the escape vehicle driven by the unknown robbers.]
Timecode: 10 minutes, 41 seconds: Tim and Amber Lake clink glasses and laugh gleefully as they toast their latest escapade. They joke about how they left clues (including a note) at the crime scene, implicating Bad Brain Johnson. Their plan is to perform crimes such as these in the name of Bad Brain Johnson so that nobody will think to look for anybody but him.
Tim Lake: You know the best part, my queen?
Amber Lake: What, my centurion?
Tim Lake: We are going to own Superman. And we don't even need this!
[The camera pans to reveal a large chunk of green glowing Kryptonite sitting on a table in front of the Lakes. They both cackle hysterically as they think about their plan. Apparently they have a plan so devious that they will "own Superman" without even needing Kryptonite. One might wonder why they stole it, then. Perhaps it is just for backup.]
Timecode: 11 minutes, 0 seconds: Another dream/homage. Clark Kent (without glasses) is dressed as James Bond. He addresses Lois Lane (attired and made up as a Bond woman) as "Miss Goodbottom." The pair act in a spot-on James Bond homage. The scene ends when Lois calls Clark by his name, but he says, "The name's Man. Super Man." Clark as James Bond then pushes a button to trigger the ejector seat to get rid of Bond girl Lois. Then Lois snaps out of her daydream and back to real life. She complains to Clark, who is next to her, driving to an interview, that in the James Bond movies James Bond did all the driving. The James Bond daydream underscores Lois Lane's anxiety about being a woman who is just a "hood ornament" for Superman, not really an equal partner or "part of the act."
Lois Lane: So, who do we see next?
Clark Kent: Uh, Tim and Amber Lake. The Tim and Amber Lake.
Lois Lane: The most written-about, talked-about, happiest, richest couple in Metropolis. You know, somehow I don't see them hanging out with Bad Brain Johnson.
Clark Kent: That tire tread we found was an Italian import. Only a few people bought 'em, and they're on the list.
Lois Lane: What did you tell them the interview was about?
Clark Kent: Ah. "How you too can achieve total and perpetual bliss with the one you love."
Lois Lane: [laughs] Good. I was wondering how that worked.
[Lois Lane and Clark Kent get out of their car and go to the outdoor cafe where they are meeting Tim and Amber Lake for a lunch-time interview. Lois Lane and Clark Kent do not realize that the Lakes have devious plans that involve them. The Lakes do not yet realize that Lois and Clark have uncovered a clue that point to them as being connected to the Bad Brain Johnson robbery of S.T.A.R. Labs.]
Amber Lake: What an amazing coincidence! Why, just the other day we were saying how much we like your work. And if we must be interviewed - and I suppose we must! [laughs] Well, we'd love to be interviewed by you!
Lois Lane: And here we are!
Clark Kent: Just trying to figure out what makes you two tick.
Tim Lake: Oh, we definitely tick. [Looking at his wife while caressing her hand.] Don't we, darling?
Amber Lake: Yes, angel.
[Tim and Amber Lake kiss each other. They may be evil murderers. But they certainly love each other. Lois and Clark look at each other uncomfortably. Seeing this display of passion makes them consider their own peculiar romance.]
[There is a cut in time and we see a waiter clearing away dishes. Apparently the interview has been going on for some time.]
Tim Lake: Oh, we never fight.
Amber Lake: Because we think exactly alike.
Clark Kent: Doesn't that get a little . . .
Tim and Amber Lake: [in unison] Boring?
[Clark Kent nods yes, that is what he had wanted to ask.]
BELOW: Tim and Amber Lake are evil murderers, but their relationship is in perfect harmony:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Amber Lake: As opposed to the half-truths, white lies, sublimated anger--
Tim Lake: Grudges, irritations, constant arguments-
Amber Lake: Of ninety-nine point nine percent of all the failed and failing relationships in the world at any given time.
Tim Lake: It must be an emotional jungle out there.
Amber Lake: A courtship horror show. [Turning to her husband.] Glad I'm nowhere near it, Lover Man.
Tim Lake: Me too, Heart of my Heart.
[They both giggle, nuzzle noses, and kiss.]
Lois Lane: So, let's talk about your hobbies.
Tim Lake: Absolutely. What would you like to know?
BELOW: Tim and Amber Lake collect everything (especially unique, forbidden things):
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Lois Lane: Well, we hear you collect cars.
Amber Lake: We collect everything.
Tim Lake: Cars. [turning to his wife] We have how many, darling? Eighty?
Amber Lake: Eighty-three, my pet.
Tim Lake: Oh, your mind is like a crystal. Too many facets to count!
[Clark Kent asks the Lakes an "off the record" question, claiming he wants advice about the brand of Italian tires that Lois and Clark found treads from at the robbery scene. The Lakes claim that they bought the tires for a business acquaintance and that they don't own them any more. But after the leave the interview, Lois and Clark suspect the Lakes were lying and trying to hide something.]
Lois Lane: [walking away from cafe with Clark] I don't know if I suspect them because they're suspects or because they make me want to barf.
Clark Kent: Heh. His eyes did do a little dance when we mentioned those tires, but . . . Could they have busted Bad Brain out of prison? Those two?
Lois Lane: I think we should find every piece of information we can on Tim and Amber Lake.
[Lois and Clark get in their vehicle and drive away. After seeing them go, Tim and Amber Lake talk about Clark's questions about their tires. The couple realizes that Lois and Clark are on to them.]
Amber Lake: I suppose it could just be an amazing coincidence.
Tim Lake: Do you reall think so?
Amber Lake: Of course not. But, Clark Kent's not part of our plan, correct?
Tim Lake: As always.
Amber Lake: Then let's kill him!
[Amber laughs. She delights in the thought of murdering people.]
Tim Lake: Better yet. Have Bad Brain Johnson kill him.
Amber Lake: Oh ho! [clinks her glass to Tim's] Step by step. Closer to Superman.
[Tim and Amber Lake will hatch a plan to murder Clark Kent, but make it look like Bad Brain Johnson did it.]
Timecode: 16 minutes, 34 seconds: There is a third dream/homage scene, this one an homage to the old police procedural TV series Dragnet, with Perry White and Jimmy Olsen playing the parts of Sgt. Joe Friday and Pep Streebeck. The police detectives accuse a captive Clark Kent of being an inattentive husband. They nabbed him on charges of "marital non-participation." They detectives hold up a baseball glove, for example, and ask where he was during his son's Little League game. This indicates Clark Kent's anxiety about getting married. He worries his role as Superman will take him away from his wife and family far too much.
[Clark Kent snaps out of his Dragnet daydream when Jimmy Olsen brings him papers relating to their investigation: research on the Lakes.]
Timecode: 18 minutes, 47 seconds: As part of their research into the Lakes, Lois and Clark watch a tape of the TV series Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, in which Robin Leach profiles uber-wealthy couple Tim and Amber Lake.]
BELOW: Robin Leach ('Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous') profiles super-rich couple Tim and Amber Lake:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Robin Leach: Their love is not just a many-splendored thing. Oh, no! It's a rare and wonderous thing! Like their shared passion for beauty and art and everything unqiue! Tim and Amber collect romance alongside Picassos, race horses and homes. But the thing they treasure most is their love for one another!
[Lois Lane uses the remote control to turn the TV off on which they were watching the tape about the Lakes.]
Lois Lane: Enough!
Clark Kent: I know. I can only take so much. Are these guys for real?
Lois Lane: Why not? They seem just like us. [sarcastically] Never fight. They think exactly alike.
Clark Kent: [laughs] Yeah . . . You want some coffee?
Lois Lane: Sure. Anyway, they don't seem like criminals.
[Lois picks up Clark's glasses, which he isn't wearing now that they are in the privacy of his apartment.]
Lois Lane: What do I know? These glasses fooled me for two years!
[Clark chuckles. Lois puts the glasses on her face and looks at her reflection in a metallic bowel.]
Lois Lane: Oh, boy, what a dope!
Clark Kent: Is it your fault that I picked such a brilliant disguise?
[Lois Lane turns serious. She asks Clark if they're "okay." She tells him that she had the strangest flash/daydream during the day, and he says he had the same thing happen to him. They think it must be due to the pressure of talking about marriage and their relationship. Clark suggests that maybe they should just stop talking. He moves in to kiss Lois, but then an remote-controlled miniature helicopter shoots lasers into Clark's apartment, trying to kill Clark. Clark destroys the helicopter with his heat visino, but not before it fires many laser beams at them and destroys part of Clark's apartment. Lois and Clark think that Bad Brain Johnson is trying to kill them. To keep Lois safe, Clark takes her to his parents' farm home in Smallville. While Lois and Clark are at the farmhouse, Martha and Jonathan Kent give them some good advice about their idea to not talk about marriage. The elder Kents suggest that trying to keep their thoughts in might drive them a little nuts, and it would be better to talk openly.]
[We see Tim and Amber Lake working on their plan to trap Superman. Apparently they want Superman himself added to their secret collection of rare items. As part of their plan, Tim Lake is preparing a doctored tape of Superman's voice, rearranging words and phrases Superman has recorded for other purposes. Meanwhile, Superman assists with rescue efforts after a massive earthquake in China. Back in Smallville, Lois continues research and realizes that Tim and Amber Lake are on the board of directors at S.T.A.R. Labs. Lois rushes back to Metropolis. She talks to Dr. Klein and finds out that, under financial pressure, he revealed to the Lakes that Kryptonite was stored at S.T.A.R. Labs. Lois thus realizes that the Lakes were behind the Kryptonite robbery, but she has no proof.]
[Lois receives a phone call, ostensibly from Clark, asking her to meet him in an alley behind the Daily Planet building. The phone call is actually the doctored audio tape prepared by Tim Lake. Lois rushes to the meeting spot. Tim Lake, disguised as Bad Brain Johnson wearing a Superman costume is there. He videotapes himself using his electronic gadget on Lois, apparently disintegrating her. The video is then sent to the Daily Planet. Perry White, Jimmy Olsen and all of Lois Lane's colleagues at the Daily Planet watch the tape and think that Lois is dead. Superman arrives at the office, sees the tape, and thinks the same thing. He goes to the scene where Lois was "disintegrated" and mourns. He genuinely believes Lois is dead. But then we cut to the collection room in the Lake mansion, where we see Lois captive on a raised platform surrounded by an electronic force field. (Perhaps it should be called a "light field.") Lois touches the force field and it shocks her.]
Timecode: 31 minutes, 9 seconds:
Tim Lake: I wouldn't do that. Sustained contact for longer than pount three seconds will detonate the two hundred pounds of TNT directly beneath your feet. [laughs]
Lois Lane: Why am I here?
Amber Lake: We're faking your death!
Lois Lane: Everbody thinks I'm dead?
Amber Lake: Especially Superman.
Tim Lake: A little video editing, coupled with Bad Brain Johnson's very public hatred of you . . . Everyone thinks you were fried by Bad Brain's electro-whammy.
Lois Lane: Where is Bad Brain?
Tim Lake: His death we didn't fake!
[Tim Lake laughs gleefully. He relishes the fact that they murdered Bad Brain Johnson.]
BELOW: Tim and Amber Lake murdered Bad Brain Johnson as one step toward their ultimate goal: adding Superman to their secret collection:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Lois Lane: You killed him?
Amber Lake: Right after we broke him out of prison.
Tim Lake: He was superfluous.
Amber Lake: We wanted you.
Tim Lake: As a means to an end. Superman's.
Amber Lake: We're collectors. You're the honey, Honey. Superman's the bee.
Timecode: 32 minutes, 14 seconds: Dr. Klein contacts Superman and tells him about the fact that just before she "died", Lois realized that Tim and Amber Lake were behind the Kryptonite robbery. Superman flies immediately to confront the Lakes in their mansion. The Lakes are expecting him, anxious for him to arrive. Tim and Amber Lake show Superman into their secret collection room, where Superman sees Lois is trapped on the platform surrounded by a force field. Superman rushes to Lois, but doesn't go onto the platform because he sees there is an invisible force field. The force field is not strong enough to keep him out if he wants to break through it, but it has a sensor that detects when somebody touches it.
Lois Lane: Superman!
Superman: Lois!
[Superman reaches for Lois, causing the force field to spark when his fingers touch it.]
Tim Lake: So near, and yet so far.
[Tim and Amber Lake both laugh heartily.]
Lois Lane: It's a trap.
Superman: I know.
Lois Lane: They have Kryptonite.
Superman: I don't care.
[Tim Lake pushes a button and explains his trap to Superman.
Tim Lake: You've got thirty seconds. You mess with the timer, she dies. You break the light field, she dies. You try to disarm the bomb and clean our clock, she also dies. The only way for you to save her is to join our collection.
Amber Lake: Forever.
BELOW: Tim and Amber use Lois Lane to force Superman to become part of their secret collection - forever!
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
[Tim Lake presses another button and a second platform with a light field ("force field") is illuminated. Ominous music plays on the underscore.]
Lois Lane: Don't do it.
Superman: It's the only way to keep you alive.
Lois Lane: Would you stop. The world needs you.
Superman: And I need you.
Tim Lake: Ten seconds and counting!
Lois Lane: You'll be trapped! Caged!
Superman: I'll be with you.
Amber Lake: Two seconds.
[Superman, levitating, drifts into the middle of the second platform. He steps on the platform.]
Lois Lane: No!
[Tim Lake presses another button and activates the light field surrounding the platform he is standing on.]
Tim Lake: Liftoff!
Amber Lake: We did it!
[Tim and Amber Lake kiss each other, obviously glad and thrilled that they have managed to add Superman to their unique collection.]
Tim Lake: You see, Superman, we wanted you alive. Lois is the lock on your cage. Either of you breaks the light field, she gets it. No matter how fast you fly, you still set it off. Now, the floor is a mine field, anyone tries to rescue-- Well! You get the idea. We'll talk about your feeding schedule later. [To Amber] How about a drink, Amber?
Amber Lake: I'm buying!
Tim Lake: [Starting to leave, but calling back to Superman] Oh, one last detail . . .
[Tim Lake picks up a Superman costume - the one he wore earlier when luring Lois Lane into a trap. He rips the costume.]
Amber Lake: With the two of you and Clark dead, no one will come looking for you.
Tim Lake: And since Bad Brain did it, no one will come looking for us.
Amber Lake: Oh, isn't he fantastic! [To Superman and Lois] Welcome to forever!
[Tim and Amber, their hands all over each other, walk out of the room and lower the wall that is the secret entrance to the collection room. They laugh as they leave. Superman and Lois Lane are left alone in the collection room, each standing on their own platform, separated by about fifteen feet.]
Lois Lane: This isn't exactly how I pictured us getting old together.
[Superman smiles at Lois Lane's words, which contain a hint of humor.]
Lois Lane: You gave up everything in my life. For me.
Superman: Without you it wouldn't have been a life.
[Superman looks around the room and at the cage.]
Timecode: 35 minutes, 45 seconds: Perry White's office.
Perry White: She's gone, Jimmy. I'll never get used to that, either. Now, have we heard from Clark?
Jimmy Olsen: No. Why couldn't she have just stayed hidden?
Perry White: Lois is a very . . . was a very headstrong woman.
Jimmy Olsen: Chief, Superman will find Bad Brain, and when he does, I'd hate to be in his shoes. But I'd love to be there to see Superman kick his butt.
Perry White: Yeah, but where is Superman? I mean, is he even on the case?
Jimmy Olsen: You want my guess? Superman is somewhere bummin' big time.
[An employee delivers a package. Perry opens it.]
BELOW: Perry White and Jimmy Olsen: Oh, my God! Superman is dead!
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Perry White: What's this?
[The package contains a cape from Superman's costume, along with the Kryptonite rock stolen from S.T.A.R. Labs by the Lakes. There is a note, ostensibly from Big Brain Johnson, that reads "Third time's a charm".]
Perry White: Oh, my God.
Jimmy Olsen: He's dead. Superman is dead.
Timecode: 37 minutes, 7 seconds: The secret collection room at the Lake mansion:
Lois Lane: I was thinking.
Superman: About?
Lois Lane: Little things. All the stupid little things I let bother me. Things I kept inside. That keep us apart.
Superman: I know. I was the same way.
Superman: Maybe your parents were right. Not talking about our fears just made them worse than they are.
Superman: I guess you don't really want to be Superman, do you?
Lois Lane: [smiles] No. I guess you think of me as more than a hood ornament?
BELOW: Lois Lane to Superman: You can touch me with your words:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Superman: I don't even own a car. [Chuckles. Pause.] God, I wish I could touch you.
Lois Lane: Well, you can touch me. With your words. Ever since we met . . . Actually, ever since I took the time to listen, something about you always made sense to me. Even when a huge part of you didn't make any sense, there was a part deep down that-- that did. And that's the part that touches me. That makes sense out of life.
Superman: Lois.
Lois Lane: I know. I know.
[End of scene. Cut to later, night time. Lois is sleeping. Superman is thinking. He has been thinking for a long time. His face shows he has come to a decision. Superman tells Lois Lane to wake up. He tells her his plan. His super speed lets him be so fast that he can fly around the world in molecules. He believes that if he concentrates and focuses on his speed, that he can vibrate his body's molecules and pass through the force field without setting it off. Although he has never done this before and doing so is very dangerous, he decides to take a chance. Lois tries to talk him out of it, worried that it won't work and that the attempt could kill him. But he goes ahead and vibrates his body's molecules and passes through the force field that surrounds his platform cage. The effort causes him great pain, but after escaping his cage, he hovers over to the control panel and then uses his speed to stop the explosion-triggering circuits from closing when Lois touches the force field as he instructs him to. Thus, after an extended, tense sequence, Superman frees himself and Lois. He sends her to call the police. After Lois and Superman are both free from their traps, the Lakes hear an alarm and go to the "zoo" (as they call it) to investigate. When the see Lois gone and Superman free, all they can do is say (together): "Uh oh."]
BELOW: Newspaper headline declares Tim and Amber Lake a 'perfectly evil' couple:
Source: Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman - Season 3, Episode 6 (5 Nov. 1995). Written by David Simkims. Directed by Steven Dubin.
Timecode: 43 minutes, 52 seconds: Later, the Daily Planet offices. Focus on a headline proclaiming: "Perfect Couple Perfectly Evil." The article, written by Lois Lane and Clark Kent, is subtitled: "Amber and Tim Lake Separated... At Last." The accompanying photo shows police officers taking Tim and Amber Lake away from their stately mansion in separate squad cars. Clark Kent rips the newspaper in half, smilng broadly while his colleagues cheer and welcome him and Lois back from the dead.
Lois Lane: With any luck, that'll be the last time Tim and Amber Lake see each other.
Perry White: Great job, you two. If you want a lifetime contract, just see me.
[Lois and Clark exchange meaningful looks. Perry's words referred to their job at the newspaper. But Lois and Clark are thinking about the "lifetime contract" that they want their planned marriage to be.]
Clark Kent: Actually, we're working on that.
Lois Lane: Definitely.
Perry White: Well, I know you all have had a difficult time these last couple weeks.
Clark Kent: We're . . . okay, Perry.
Perry White: Yeah? Well, just remember, there's no perfect sunsets. There's a little crack in every cloud, but that's what gives you your silver lining. So, uh, well-- [raises his champagne glass] Here's to silver linings!
Lois Lane: I'll drink to that.
[Perry, Lois, Clark and Jimmy clink their glasses and take a sip while the crowd of employees cheer and clap. Clark walks to his desk. He looks over at Lois, with great love in his eyes. He pulls the engagement ring from his desk and looks at it. Jimmy looks at him.]
Clark Kent: Whaddyou think?
Jimmy Olsen: There's no time like the right time.
[Jimmy walks away. Clark sits down, continuing to look at Lois. The camera pans to the festive banner hung for the party: "WELCOME BACK LOIS AND CLARK". Fade out. End of scene. End of episode.]